We’ve already covered Shared Care and Making Commitments

Now, let’s dive into a crucial topic: giving feedback.

And not just the “you’re awesome” kind, but the hard stuff that actually helps people grow.

As a coach, I hear this all the time: leaders want to be positive and encouraging but have no idea how to deliver the tough feedback that really moves the needle.

And employees? They’re often not ready to receive it. So, we get stuck in this endless loop of “great job” without the important “…but here’s how you can improve.”

High fives are great. But tough conversations about improvement? Even better.

Why Feedback Matters

A team that avoids giving and getting feedback is like a plant that’s getting plenty of sunshine but no water. Sure, it’s standing upright, but it’s not growing. If your team is too focused on handing out high fives and avoiding the hard truths, you’re capping growth and hoping people can guess what they need to do to improve.

Feedback is how we get better, together.

Prepping Your Team for Feedback

Before diving into feedback, it’s helpful to lay some groundwork. If giving and receiving feedback is going to be an important part of team culture, you need to prepare folks and set new expectations.

Pre-work for leaders:

• Talk about the benefits of feedback: Sit down as a team and discuss why feedback is important. What’s the goal?  When you see others, it may be obvious that with a tweak here or there they could become more effective. But who’s gonna tell ‘em? We are responsible of for one another.
• Remind everyone of your shared care and shared goals: Growth doesn’t happen without a little discomfort. Make sure everyone’s on board with the idea that in order to hit your team’s goals, you might need to polish some skills along the way.
• Let people ask for feedback: Encourage team members to decide where they’d like feedback. It’s a lot easier to digest when it feels like you’ve invited it, rather than getting hit out of nowhere with a list of things to fix.

Action Steps for Leaders

• Practice "radical candor": Feedback should be regular and honest. Feedback should use actual examples of a recent experience. Feedback can be firm, but full of empathy.
• Read the room: find the right time to share feedback. Praise publicly, criticize privately. If it’s obvious someone bombed a review, maybe itemizing their failings immediately after isn’t the right move. Give some time to recover before you unpack what could have been done differently.
• Keep feedback constructive, not critical: Only give feedback if it’s going to benefit the team or the individual’s growth. Complaints disguised as feedback? Yeah, we don’t need that. No one’s growing from your rant about how Janet types too loud.
• Create feedback loops: Make a habit of asking, “What could we improve?” after every project or meeting. Or better, feedback about moving a specific needle “I’m trying to be more concise. How am I doing? Where did I still ramble?” The more normal feedback becomes, the less scary it is. It’s like turning down the volume on the awkwardness.
• Don’t wait for reviews: If something’s off, address it early and often. Don’t let things fester. Pulling out small weed seedlings is much easier than whacking back a full grown field of invasive species with roots deep into team culture.

Why Feedback is a Practice: It Gets Easier

If giving difficult feedback sounds too overwhelming, there may be good reason or bad experiences you’ve had in the past. It’s still a skill worth building. Start in low-stakes or high trust spaces. Preview the conversation and share what you want to take care of (the relationship, better outcomes for all involved). Practice doesn’t make perfect, but it will make it easier.

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