We are in an incredibly busy, noisy time right now — so much change, so much uncertainty, so much low-grade (and high-grade?) fear humming in every aspect of our lives.

This isn’t imagined; there are real, very serious things happening in your world (mine, too!). But knowing how to deal with these changes, make choices in confusing times, and care for what’s most important to you can be challenging.

Fear separates us from the part of ourselves that actually knows what to do. Our culture’s demands for speed and its increasing pace of change are chaotic. It’s hard to find our ground. We lose connection with the wisdom that quietly guides us to our best choices even in difficult times.

“It’s hard to hear a boulder in a waterfall, but you can hear a pebble in a still pond.” - Martha Beck

But who’s a still pond? It’s all rushing waterfalls these days. News, Slack, email, daycare announcements, weather alerts, AI posts, and bigger issues to solve. I read (more) bad news, search to see if the bad news is true, try to figure out how I can prepare, wonder what will help, continue to process bad news, then look for an all-purpose answer.

Then quit and eat a snack.

We lose the connection to ourselves, we try to fill the gap of disconnection. We fill the gap space with mental thinking, rumination, and “figuring”. Trying to “figure it out” from every angle. The pros and cons lists. Rehashing the past. The conversations with five different people, researching the experts, hoping someone will finally tell us (exactly) what to do. And when that gets overwhelming, we numb out.

Talking things through is human. We need to think analytically and reconsider. It’s not wrong. Data, research, information - these are all helpful in specific ways. But when this comes at the cost of your own internal connection to what will best serve your life, you are living in the static of disconnection. Nothing feels clear. So you double down on your strategy. More research. More rumination.

There’s a flavor of resignation that comes with the disconnection.

But what can you do?

Well, what CAN you do?

I’ve found a few things that help me reconnect and close the gap. There are my go-to practices that allow me to touch into the true richness (and reality) of life beyond the overwhelm. I invite you to reach for one of these five practices before you reach for your phone. Reconnection to my humanity and the beauty of the world around me is better than any TikTok.

1. Redirection

• Lately, when I start to go down a negative thought spiral (of despair) or start down a well-worn habit like reaching for my phone, I say out loud, “Nope! Don’t do it. Drop it.” Honestly, it’s exactly the voice I use when I’m training my dog. I’m not shouting, but I also mean business. Somehow, hearing my voice out loud interrupts the thought. Hearing that instruction helps me redirect. Stop the spiral.

2. Meditation

• Sitting, walking, knitting, humming, whatever helps clear your mind. When it comes to meditation, I know “there’s an app for that,” but before you get caught up in which app and which meditation, just set a timer on your phone for one minute and follow your breath. Let thoughts pass through.
• If you’re someone who has tried meditation but can’t because the thoughts don’t stop, first of all, yes, hello, welcome to being a human. Secondly, give your busy brain something to hold onto. Focusing on a bird singing nearby. Walking or moving as slowly as possible. Drawing with complete concentration. Sometimes brains need a lil’ job to find single-pointed focus.
• Closing the gap means reconnecting to the reality and presence of the moment.

3. Appreciation

• No matter the news, look around and find something to appreciate. Your health. The blue sky. The meal cooking. Sound too obvious or trite? The point is to redirect your attention the reality of what is good and present right now.
• This is simple but it can be a profound wake up to the real moment you are in. (The only moment you have!) The key to this one is to feel something.
• Feel appreciation as that warm glow, heart softening, eyes a bit wider. Feel the weight of your dog pulling the leash, the smell of the wind as seasons change, the care of a coworker who did something to make your life easier. The community group picking up trash in the median. The rich kindness behind so many people around you.
• P.S. Many of people confuse Gratitude for Appreciation. Gratitude has a tinge of “I don’t deserve it but…” or “I should be grateful it could be worse.” or “I shouldn’t be thankless, I should be grateful and forever in debt…” Appreciation is the pure love and noticing of what’s good. To appreciate is to purposefully see the real good, beauty, charm, joy or characteristics of something. To appreciate is to increase the value. Try it and see.

4. Creativity

• Make something. Draw, knit, sing, improvise a silly tap dance, make up a dumb knock-knock joke. Do something that draws on your inherent creativity. It doesn’t have to be “good.”, In fact, the more lightheartedness you bring, the better. (If you could see one of my knitting projects - well, let’s say AI could never!)
• Doodle on a scrap paper. Make a collage with leaves on your path. Play a rhyming game with your kids. It can be ephemeral. It can be only a few moments. Work a muscle that is disused when you’re stressed on high-alert. Creativity opens possibilities.

5. Nature

• Reconnect with yourself through nature. Don’t think of it as “reconnecting with nature”, think of it (more accurately) as reconnecting with yourself. We are nature, buddy.
• Trees are making our oxygen, plants are your food, clouds hold your water. Recognize the connection and find ways to bring nature into your home with flowers or a plant or a special rock. Put nature into your daily schedule with a ramble down the street, gazing at a cloud when you’re on the bus, keeping an eye out for birds outside your kitchen window.

I hope you choose some way to find a human scale and human pace in the immediate present moment. The problems and subsequent changes needed are larger than one person can fix. By being more connected to yourself, you’ll be grounded. You’ll get to know yourself better. You might find joy in these practices. And you’ll be better equipped to connect with others and address the issues we face.

And go easy! These are practices, not to-do’s. Some days you’ll remember, then more days you’ll remember, then you won’t have to remember because it’s part of who you are.

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